Totally forgot! I WISH I HAD AN XBOX 360 OR PS3. .
You know why?! FFXIII came out today. . . ;_________;
-sigh- broken hearted :[
Tuesday, March 9, 2010
Am I in the Wrong??
Am I in the Wrong? Somehow?
Ok. I'm in an extremely bad mood, because I got off the phone with my mum. I told her about my day. Everything all good same same. But then she asked me if I spent any money. I was like, yes, i bought cereal. Because I ran out. She asked me oh you went with your roommate? I proceeded to say no, I went with another friend, we WALKED... . . . Then hell broke lose. Of course, she proceeded to say, really? your dad wouldn't like it, i'm getting the shivers thinking about tat!! BLAHBALHBALBHLHBALBH
Wtf? really? I can't even walk to the stoer which is like 10 mintues away to buy fucking cereal? My friend had pepper spray, and I had an alarm. Plus there's just two of us. If anything went down, we could kick ass right? She blinds them, I make em deaf. I don't even know why I told my mum that. Because i should have known better that my parents are ANAL about shit like this. OH! Your on your own in college, take care of yourself. THATS WHAT I DID. omfg. I don't know why but I think I'm very mad, because I take care of myself very well here, mind you. I don't go out and party becaues that doesn't appeal to me, plus a lot of shit happens and it can be very unsafe. Even now I don't understand why people go party, and drink when they're underage. Still a mystery.
But I know no one will read this. Am I wrong here? Was it not safe for me and my friend to go out which was 6 pm there was still light out. To go to the store? Mind you I would have asked my roommate to take me. But she recently was bitching saying that she feels used because of her best friend. Because she feels like her best friend only hangs out with her because she has a car. . . . wtf? If you care about your best friend then you do so. My best friend did that for me, because i DON'T have a car. MY best friend is awesome. My roommate feels used because her best friend wants to hang out then says OH can you pick me up? . . . .. Then because I felt like if I ask her to drive me then she'll feel that I'm using her. I don't know. I wish I could smack someone in the face. Preferably someone in the same room. But I'm just bitching right now. This week sucks.
AM I WRONG HERE?! I'm in fu**ing college.
I'm so freaking angry, that I can't think straight. And I have to write a freaking essay.
Ok. I'm in an extremely bad mood, because I got off the phone with my mum. I told her about my day. Everything all good same same. But then she asked me if I spent any money. I was like, yes, i bought cereal. Because I ran out. She asked me oh you went with your roommate? I proceeded to say no, I went with another friend, we WALKED... . . . Then hell broke lose. Of course, she proceeded to say, really? your dad wouldn't like it, i'm getting the shivers thinking about tat!! BLAHBALHBALBHLHBALBH
Wtf? really? I can't even walk to the stoer which is like 10 mintues away to buy fucking cereal? My friend had pepper spray, and I had an alarm. Plus there's just two of us. If anything went down, we could kick ass right? She blinds them, I make em deaf. I don't even know why I told my mum that. Because i should have known better that my parents are ANAL about shit like this. OH! Your on your own in college, take care of yourself. THATS WHAT I DID. omfg. I don't know why but I think I'm very mad, because I take care of myself very well here, mind you. I don't go out and party becaues that doesn't appeal to me, plus a lot of shit happens and it can be very unsafe. Even now I don't understand why people go party, and drink when they're underage. Still a mystery.
But I know no one will read this. Am I wrong here? Was it not safe for me and my friend to go out which was 6 pm there was still light out. To go to the store? Mind you I would have asked my roommate to take me. But she recently was bitching saying that she feels used because of her best friend. Because she feels like her best friend only hangs out with her because she has a car. . . . wtf? If you care about your best friend then you do so. My best friend did that for me, because i DON'T have a car. MY best friend is awesome. My roommate feels used because her best friend wants to hang out then says OH can you pick me up? . . . .. Then because I felt like if I ask her to drive me then she'll feel that I'm using her. I don't know. I wish I could smack someone in the face. Preferably someone in the same room. But I'm just bitching right now. This week sucks.
AM I WRONG HERE?! I'm in fu**ing college.
I'm so freaking angry, that I can't think straight. And I have to write a freaking essay.
Saturday, March 6, 2010
Undecisive.. I am.
Title sounds a bit like Yoda. tee hee.
With previous posts, I've been working with a career counselor trying to figure out what kind of career path that I should take within my college major. So I've decided to switch to undeclared for now. Just to let my options open. Take other types of classes and see what's going on, and see what sparks my interest.
So far I'm most interested in is.
Skin care / cosmetics
Video games
Something artsy (illustration, jewelery/fashion(?))
Language
That's all that I feel like I'll be really happy doing. But the thing is. I know some of the things don't really pay as well as I would hope it would. Like doing something in language. That's most likely going to be a side job, since it's not a solid job. I was talking to my best friend and she suggested being a medical translator. I wasn't quite sure about that. I have to know a lot of medical terms, and don't screw up. Because it'll be really bad and I'll feel so terrible if i mistranslated something.
And recently my best friend said that she's interested in making clothing, and she said if I can't think of anything that I should work with her with that. And I TOTALLY WOULD! OMFG. How fun would that be! Making cute ass clothes, drag my imagination out of it's corner because I forced it there because of college! She sparked something that I would have total fun with, albeit probably stress a lot over.
I just her some of the blogs that I follow, listed in my profile thing. Most of them are some how involved with clothing, jewelry, or makeup. And what they're doing is so interesting to me. It looks like a lot of fun, and they look like they're happy doing what they do. I'm REALLY envious of that. Because I just can't choose. I've always like doing something creative. Also my result of my interest test thing, that I had to take for my career counselor, how out as 'Arts, Design, Entertainment, Sports, and Media' and it got 100%!!!! The one is 'Education, Library Sciences, and Training', but that only got a 75%
Umm..Yeah. ^____^;; So.
She just sparked something in me that sounds to FU**ING appealing to me! But she says that it's probably going to be a side thing, and a hobby for right now. Which I totally agree with her on. Don't want to be doing stuff with fashion, and being broke!! That's a no no. Plus fabric is pricey!! AND she also made another good point. "It's not as easy as people think it is!" Which is freaking true! The people that I follow blog, and youtube wise. They do what they do because they love it, and have a good ... following of people? If I can put it that way. I guess that they are successful with what they're doing because they're making things that other people like, and will buy. Which I think is true. Because I see some of things that they create, and they are hella cute!! Makes me wish I had spending money that I can buy stuff from them.
There are a few that I follow, and they're doing what I wish I could/would do.
But the thing is, another major part of my career making decision is. Dun dun dun. My parents that's such a big one. Even though they tell me time, time and again. "Do whatever makes you happy to do, and don't make your decision based upon us." . . Excuse me? That doesn't help at all! I love them to death. But it's really hard. Because they have careers for me that they prefer. Because they know that it's safe, and I'll make good money from it. I feel like if I don't do something that makes good money, safe, and reliable that, I'll make them disappointed. That's how I feel. I'll feel like they won't be proud of me. EVEN THOUGH, I know that they will be with anything I do. I just feel like that. If I don't do something in health field. That they'll be so disappointed. My brother is doing pharmacy after switching several times. And they are happy with that. Because, haha, good money. My parents also expressed their interest in me that I could do the same, and I feel overwhelmed. They say things like do whatever you feel that will make you happy. We just have careers that we prefer for you.
My career counselor, says that it's a good thing that I switched to undeclared, because I can take a breather. See what my options are. Which is awesome. Because I do feel better about it. But, ARGGH! It's still in the back of my mind, and it's driving me insane.
This would help if I found a husband, that's going to make most of the money, and is willingly let me do the things that I'm interested in. As long as he's in a career that he's happy with. That's one option. But that'll be a hard one to find. :P It'd be nice though, thinking about it now. haha
END!
With previous posts, I've been working with a career counselor trying to figure out what kind of career path that I should take within my college major. So I've decided to switch to undeclared for now. Just to let my options open. Take other types of classes and see what's going on, and see what sparks my interest.
So far I'm most interested in is.
Skin care / cosmetics
Video games
Something artsy (illustration, jewelery/fashion(?))
Language
That's all that I feel like I'll be really happy doing. But the thing is. I know some of the things don't really pay as well as I would hope it would. Like doing something in language. That's most likely going to be a side job, since it's not a solid job. I was talking to my best friend and she suggested being a medical translator. I wasn't quite sure about that. I have to know a lot of medical terms, and don't screw up. Because it'll be really bad and I'll feel so terrible if i mistranslated something.
And recently my best friend said that she's interested in making clothing, and she said if I can't think of anything that I should work with her with that. And I TOTALLY WOULD! OMFG. How fun would that be! Making cute ass clothes, drag my imagination out of it's corner because I forced it there because of college! She sparked something that I would have total fun with, albeit probably stress a lot over.
I just her some of the blogs that I follow, listed in my profile thing. Most of them are some how involved with clothing, jewelry, or makeup. And what they're doing is so interesting to me. It looks like a lot of fun, and they look like they're happy doing what they do. I'm REALLY envious of that. Because I just can't choose. I've always like doing something creative. Also my result of my interest test thing, that I had to take for my career counselor, how out as 'Arts, Design, Entertainment, Sports, and Media' and it got 100%!!!! The one is 'Education, Library Sciences, and Training', but that only got a 75%
Umm..Yeah. ^____^;; So.
She just sparked something in me that sounds to FU**ING appealing to me! But she says that it's probably going to be a side thing, and a hobby for right now. Which I totally agree with her on. Don't want to be doing stuff with fashion, and being broke!! That's a no no. Plus fabric is pricey!! AND she also made another good point. "It's not as easy as people think it is!" Which is freaking true! The people that I follow blog, and youtube wise. They do what they do because they love it, and have a good ... following of people? If I can put it that way. I guess that they are successful with what they're doing because they're making things that other people like, and will buy. Which I think is true. Because I see some of things that they create, and they are hella cute!! Makes me wish I had spending money that I can buy stuff from them.
There are a few that I follow, and they're doing what I wish I could/would do.
But the thing is, another major part of my career making decision is. Dun dun dun. My parents that's such a big one. Even though they tell me time, time and again. "Do whatever makes you happy to do, and don't make your decision based upon us." . . Excuse me? That doesn't help at all! I love them to death. But it's really hard. Because they have careers for me that they prefer. Because they know that it's safe, and I'll make good money from it. I feel like if I don't do something that makes good money, safe, and reliable that, I'll make them disappointed. That's how I feel. I'll feel like they won't be proud of me. EVEN THOUGH, I know that they will be with anything I do. I just feel like that. If I don't do something in health field. That they'll be so disappointed. My brother is doing pharmacy after switching several times. And they are happy with that. Because, haha, good money. My parents also expressed their interest in me that I could do the same, and I feel overwhelmed. They say things like do whatever you feel that will make you happy. We just have careers that we prefer for you.
My career counselor, says that it's a good thing that I switched to undeclared, because I can take a breather. See what my options are. Which is awesome. Because I do feel better about it. But, ARGGH! It's still in the back of my mind, and it's driving me insane.
This would help if I found a husband, that's going to make most of the money, and is willingly let me do the things that I'm interested in. As long as he's in a career that he's happy with. That's one option. But that'll be a hard one to find. :P It'd be nice though, thinking about it now. haha
END!
Wednesday, February 17, 2010
Bleeeh
I wished I can turn my blog into something interesting. So far it's been boring, and most of it is me ranting about things that are making me angry at the time. :\
I'll probably do something with it when I have time. Maybe put some pictures. We'll see..
-sigh- Time to murder the rest of my essay that I got to do. :| I hate writing essays.
I'll probably do something with it when I have time. Maybe put some pictures. We'll see..
-sigh- Time to murder the rest of my essay that I got to do. :| I hate writing essays.
Sunday, February 14, 2010
Happy Chinese New Year/ Chuc Mung Nam Moi/Happy Valentine's day!!!
In happier news.
CHUC MUNG NAM MOI!!
I hope everyone is getting a lot of li xi/red envelopes. :)
Whew. And back at school, such a bummer.
Oh and Happy Valentine's Day to all the lovers out there.........Jealous. :[
There's a lot going on today, friends b-day, new years, v-day. @_@;
Well time to get back to studying, and what not. :\ But in the other hand.....I'm gonna play pokemon.. haha.
CHUC MUNG NAM MOI!!
I hope everyone is getting a lot of li xi/red envelopes. :)
Whew. And back at school, such a bummer.
Oh and Happy Valentine's Day to all the lovers out there.........Jealous. :[
There's a lot going on today, friends b-day, new years, v-day. @_@;
Well time to get back to studying, and what not. :\ But in the other hand.....I'm gonna play pokemon.. haha.
Thursday, December 10, 2009
A complete failure. (long post)
Have you ever knew what you wanted to be when you were younger? But has it changed a few (hundred) times as you grew up? Well, I know how you feel.
I remember when I was asked for the first time, "What do you want to be when you grow up?". At that time I had know clue what I wanted to be, so I just said "A teacher." Then in 4th grade, we were asked the same question. We did a class project, it was a quilt mural, and each of our murals was what career we wanted in the the future. Everyone had a different square, someone wanted to be a doctor, a computer programmer, a vet, etc. Mine was, a fashion designer.
Then in the beginning of 6th grade I was contemplating what I wanted to do. So I had stuck with, Graphic Designer for a bit until 9th grade. I changed it to a Video Game Designer, or a Video Game Concept Artist. And I stuck with the idea of going into the video game industry for a long time. And I thought that it was set in stone.
On to Junior year, now I have to find out what college I wanted to go to, and decide what major I wanted that would lead to my career path. This was my, "Oh shit." moment. Because now I could no longer imagine and dream my future career. Now I had to CHOOSE it. I started to look up various career path. I still considered of going into the video game industry. But then I had to get the talk with my dad, and wow, was that stressful. I thought up of a lot of careers that I thought were interesting, but I just had something else on my mind. Would it financially support me? Would I enjoy it? I ask myself every question there was. And I still had no solid plan.
I thought of Physician, Pastry Chef, Cosmetic Surgeon, Photographer, Translator, Musician, Video Game Designer, Physician's Assistant, etc. Well then I thought, "Well, I'm screwed." Then eventually I chose Physician's Assistant, because they're sort of like doctors, less time in school compared to a regular Physician, and I can support myself. I thought that was set in stone as well. Then along came first term of college......I knew I wanted to change my majors, but NOW I have no clue what now.
Since finishing my first term of college, let's say that I'm not doing so hot, so far I got a C, and a D+. . WTF. Now I'm all depressed and all now. I'm just lost with myself. I always wished and hope that something would give me an obvious hint of what I should do with my life. And I always hoped that it would be my an answer. Never got it yet. I don't know what I want to do with myself. Now being depressed from learning that 2 out 4 of my classes that I'm not doing great. I'm just a lost soul not know what to do with herself. Now I have to hear this shit from my dad. I tried my hardest no lie. I just can't find my niche in life.
I'm just so lost...I might cry myself to sleep tonight.
I have several passions in my life. But those passions would turn into possible careers in the future...Until the passion dies down, and I pick up a new one.. What is wrong with me. I know that a lot of college students are the same like me, not know what to do with themselves. Some are jumping around majors, some in community college, some are undeclared majors... Now I'm just trying to find something that I'm happy with and that will support me financially in the future. But that's just asking too much... shit... Well I'm a complete failure.
I remember when I was asked for the first time, "What do you want to be when you grow up?". At that time I had know clue what I wanted to be, so I just said "A teacher." Then in 4th grade, we were asked the same question. We did a class project, it was a quilt mural, and each of our murals was what career we wanted in the the future. Everyone had a different square, someone wanted to be a doctor, a computer programmer, a vet, etc. Mine was, a fashion designer.
Then in the beginning of 6th grade I was contemplating what I wanted to do. So I had stuck with, Graphic Designer for a bit until 9th grade. I changed it to a Video Game Designer, or a Video Game Concept Artist. And I stuck with the idea of going into the video game industry for a long time. And I thought that it was set in stone.
On to Junior year, now I have to find out what college I wanted to go to, and decide what major I wanted that would lead to my career path. This was my, "Oh shit." moment. Because now I could no longer imagine and dream my future career. Now I had to CHOOSE it. I started to look up various career path. I still considered of going into the video game industry. But then I had to get the talk with my dad, and wow, was that stressful. I thought up of a lot of careers that I thought were interesting, but I just had something else on my mind. Would it financially support me? Would I enjoy it? I ask myself every question there was. And I still had no solid plan.
I thought of Physician, Pastry Chef, Cosmetic Surgeon, Photographer, Translator, Musician, Video Game Designer, Physician's Assistant, etc. Well then I thought, "Well, I'm screwed." Then eventually I chose Physician's Assistant, because they're sort of like doctors, less time in school compared to a regular Physician, and I can support myself. I thought that was set in stone as well. Then along came first term of college......I knew I wanted to change my majors, but NOW I have no clue what now.
Since finishing my first term of college, let's say that I'm not doing so hot, so far I got a C, and a D+. . WTF. Now I'm all depressed and all now. I'm just lost with myself. I always wished and hope that something would give me an obvious hint of what I should do with my life. And I always hoped that it would be my an answer. Never got it yet. I don't know what I want to do with myself. Now being depressed from learning that 2 out 4 of my classes that I'm not doing great. I'm just a lost soul not know what to do with herself. Now I have to hear this shit from my dad. I tried my hardest no lie. I just can't find my niche in life.
I'm just so lost...I might cry myself to sleep tonight.
I have several passions in my life. But those passions would turn into possible careers in the future...Until the passion dies down, and I pick up a new one.. What is wrong with me. I know that a lot of college students are the same like me, not know what to do with themselves. Some are jumping around majors, some in community college, some are undeclared majors... Now I'm just trying to find something that I'm happy with and that will support me financially in the future. But that's just asking too much... shit... Well I'm a complete failure.
Tuesday, October 6, 2009
Oh my goodness..
I'm in my second week of college. And I have to say, it's alright. The first week was alright, mainly getting use to everything and where all the buildings are.
The poopie thing was, when I had to say good-bye to my parents. I was trying so hard not to cry. My mom said "I don't want to look at you when we leave." that alone made me tear up. But then they went away, and into my college experience. First couple of days I was really homesick. But I talk to my parents everyday, because they tell me to call them everyday. ~_____~
Went home on the weekend. It was so stressful just to go home on the weekend. I had to lug my big ass duffel bag of dirty clothes to my friend's sisters apartment, so she could drive us home. But their family wanted to eat dinner like 30-40 minutes away from their house. So I had to get my brother to pick me up at the restaurant. Ugh, it was horrible. My arms were so sore the next day from carrying my duffel bag.
The best thing I got home was, being HOME! I got the best greeting from my dog. And I hugged the floor of the house. It felt so good to be home!! And I didn't have fish sauce in my diet for 6 days. It felt really nice. But I know that I won't be able to go home EVERY weekend. It'd be nice, but there will be some times where I need to study for up coming tests.
So far college classes aren't so bad. I really love my chemistry class though, the teacher is so happy and awake in the morning. And he makes us laugh, it keeps me awake. XD
Ahhh....college... I like you now, but I know I'll hate you later.. :)
The poopie thing was, when I had to say good-bye to my parents. I was trying so hard not to cry. My mom said "I don't want to look at you when we leave." that alone made me tear up. But then they went away, and into my college experience. First couple of days I was really homesick. But I talk to my parents everyday, because they tell me to call them everyday. ~_____~
Went home on the weekend. It was so stressful just to go home on the weekend. I had to lug my big ass duffel bag of dirty clothes to my friend's sisters apartment, so she could drive us home. But their family wanted to eat dinner like 30-40 minutes away from their house. So I had to get my brother to pick me up at the restaurant. Ugh, it was horrible. My arms were so sore the next day from carrying my duffel bag.
The best thing I got home was, being HOME! I got the best greeting from my dog. And I hugged the floor of the house. It felt so good to be home!! And I didn't have fish sauce in my diet for 6 days. It felt really nice. But I know that I won't be able to go home EVERY weekend. It'd be nice, but there will be some times where I need to study for up coming tests.
So far college classes aren't so bad. I really love my chemistry class though, the teacher is so happy and awake in the morning. And he makes us laugh, it keeps me awake. XD
Ahhh....college... I like you now, but I know I'll hate you later.. :)
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